Just When You Think……..

Just when you think it’s safe to let your guard down……jaws_shark-10789you get sucked right back in….

There was a death in the Cockroach family and my phone was blowing up all day.  The inevitable will be that he will contact me, which he is not supposed to do. All day long I have caught myself holding my breath…..again…..grrrr. Nothing has even happened yet and my anxiety level is through the roof.

I have the boys in my family saying horrible things like “too bad wrong one”…..karma people…don’t say that shit out loud. Geez!  Bad personal hygiene girl says “you feel bad for his mom, right even though you don’t like her?” REALLY!?  No mother deserves to lose a child even the ones who don’t wear panties.  How soon people forget she was my straw.  You know the one that broke the camel’s back, who knows how much longer Cockroach would have been in my life if she wouldn’t have pissed me off to the highest degree.If I wasn’t so pissed at her I would say thank you.

My brother sends me a text  “stay away from that sinking ship!” Do I look stupid? Again I repeat REALLY did he just say that to me? You would think that by now people would know that when I am done I am really done!  I am like an elephant I never forget and I rarely forgive.

Why is it that people can’t wait to tell me things?  The Ex wife and the new girl friend fighting in the hospital…yep I don’t miss that drama. I would put all of my money on the ex wife she may be older but everyone of her 85lbs is full of spunk and no fear. (Not that she is old but I am sure the girlfriend is freshly out of diapers)

Next is the speculation, how did he die? I have heard many different stories, I was surprised that it wasn’t because of drugs. Maybe it was but like I said it didn’t matter if he danced off of the empire state building in a tutu…he is still dead and it is still sad.

It has been two years since I have had to face any of these people. I have a little piece of paper that says I don’t have to for another three. They are not a part of my life, I do not want anything to do with any of them ever again. 

Yet somehow I keep indirectly getting sucked in….and I will fight, kick and scream to prevent it from actually happening.  If that puts me in the role of a cold hard bitch again than so be it! I am quite comfortable there.

About dragonflyzia

I am just a woman finally accepting that I was never meant to be in the box. I don't fit into any stereotypes, please don't try and label me, that doesn't work either. I am embracing my uniqueness in ways that are new and challenging to me, so that I may continue to grow and never stop learning.
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