I have thought about my choices quite a bit the last couple of days, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I think that it is part of the process of letting go of “things”….or it could just be me?
In the process of swapping out the attractive wicker filing crate that invites more clutter to rest on top of it as it collects dog hair to the ugly plastic filing box with handle…that will actually get used, I came across an old oil bill. 100 gallons in 2004 only cost $156.99 after tax…..$1.49 per gallon. Oil is at a big low…that’s what they are saying, but as for heating oil I just paid $2.37 a gallon and that’s cheap compared to the last two years….until you find an old oil bill.
Funny thing is I couldn’t afford that price then. It was my personal choice to not put my kids in daycare. I am not saying anything bad about daycare…..just that I wasn’t putting my kids in it. I don’t know how I survived working 2 or 3 days a week…but I did. I was registered for college after my divorce, I would barely have to pay for anything as a single mom of 31 years. I went through everything, all of the paperwork, it was in place….until it came to daycare…I couldn’t do it.
Some may and do say that was a mistake, maybe I would be in a different place? I wouldn’t be the same person that I am now since the experiences would be different. I am pretty comfortable with the person that I am….maybe not the 20lbs I gained when I quit smoking….but that’s physical…maybe it’s the yoga, but I “feel”me….the me on the inside….and I like her.
I had lunch with a friend today and she is a “newbie” at this single thing and trust me she made a strong choice when she changed her life. I think that she was experiencing a weak moment….we must go to Ambiance….stat! I want to make sure that she doesn’t have a big weak moment….that’s when I made my biggest mistakes. I was going to save this for February but oh what the heck…I don’t have that many tarot collages anyway.https://onceuponthewingsofadragonfly.wordpress.com/2015/01/01/hello-2015/
Please before you read this and know that my eyes were rolling as I am typing…keep in mind that a neighbor was shoving Nora Robert’s (I had really never read this genre of books before) and Susan Elizabeth Phillips books into my hands every other day…..no wonder I was so gullible….and stupid….and hopeful. I don’t think hopeful is in me any longer. So feel free to laugh and roll your eyes….just like the jaded me is doing….
Heart to mind,
body to soul.
both as a whole.
Choice to be made,
whether to trust.
attraction or love,
or unbridled lust.
Can balance be found,
It is all so risky,
when the future’s unseen.
Will the chance be taken,
to build a partnership?
Can you open your heart,
and begin this courtship?
Cheesy right? This was written by a girl who oddly was at the same stage of abstinence/celibasy that I find myself in again….only I am not as hopeful. I’m glad that I didn’t wait until February to share this embarrassment….it’s too close to the curse. If you don’t remember the curse…..https://onceuponthewingsofadragonfly.wordpress.com/2013/02/14/happy-heart-day/
I was telling the girl about the curse and she said “mom….I wouldn’t have made him take me to school…we have two days to make up a test!” ….as she looked at me in horror!!! Well the nuns weren’t that generous! I don’t know why I say it like that, I had more lay teachers than nuns…dramatic effect I guess.
Well….I’m glad that’s over…none of my tarot poems are epic, but this was the most embarrassing…..Zia