I can open up to friends, even new ones that I feel comfortable with. I’m pretty picky about my friends and have been blessed with great ones. There have been times when I tell a story after a drink or two and wake up the next day and say “what was I thinking?”
The thing about me….even when I haven’t had a single drop of alcohol I am the one who will say the thing that has heads turning “did she really just say that?” I will relive that one for days too.
I once put in an email that the point was mute instead of moot and I still beat myself up over it. The person who received the email probably didn’t notice it, but I haven’t been able to let that go and it was months ago.
I guess that for someone who hates to feel stupid, I shouldn’t be so good at it.
Do I ever divulge the deep dark parts of myself? No never…..not to anyone.
Do I ever think about dating? I would be lying if I said that it didn’t occasionally cross my mind. To be honest…..I haven’t met a single person that made me think “I want to know you better.”
Our world is so different now, I’m not sure that forever is even possible…and then I see the sweet little couples at my new job. The sweet little old lady writing out her check and her sweet little husband holding her coat for her, patiently waiting. They are just so adorable, but they didn’t grow up in a throw away society where everything can be replaced.
This post started because my little brother had a picture of us with my other brother stretched on a canvas for me as a late birthday present. He ordered it a while ago and the day that the Universe decides to have it delivered….what would have been my mother’s 65th birthday.
Do I put it up on Facebook? It is a really good picture and I love my brothers but I am still emotional about my mom….I don’t know if I should have….but I did…..Zia