Thank You, Thank You, Thank You

Holy wow! fde969a7d2f562eb7ec2205092af85da

I kept getting little signs all day long….I had at least a half dozen patients today with the birthday 3/19, my mom’s birthday. I haven’t talked to my grandma in a few years….I know, I’m a terrible granddaughter. Every time I would call she would ask when I was coming down.  How many times over the years can you say no in different ways, so I stopped calling her.  Today I picked up the phone.

First I talked to my aunt who is only five years or so older than I am, she was not feeling well. Her youngest is two weeks older than the girl….I can’t even imagine the girl having a three year old.  My aunt had nothing nice to say about her four children since she supports three of them and their children and one significant other. The one who did exceptionally well has one good kid and four kids that my aunt wouldn’t watch even if she was offered $500.00 a day…..all of them under six.

I am so glad my mom moved away from all of that. Yes, she married my dad and spent a lot of years alone because he had his head up his ass….but the alternative?  My mom had ten brothers and sisters and I would say three had marriages that stood the test of time, and only one in normalcy. I had a cousin from one of those marriages that used to stand on the lunch tables in high school praising the lord……I would have never survived there.

I did get to talk to my grandma briefly after having a very depressing conversation with my aunt. In her defense(my aunt) she did give up most of her life to stay and take care of her mother. If you asked her today she would say it through clenched teeth…yikes.  My mom’s birthday came up all day, I didn’t know what else to do so I called her mom.  I can’t say that I feel any better…..

Grandma wants some apricot kolachi so I will send her some this week….I can’t give her much, but I can send her some cookies.  I don’t even know what else to say.  When we were little I remember telling my friend about using the outhouse when we visited my grandparents and my mom getting really upset…..maybe she was embarrassed? It was different and it never embarrassed me, but I only visited there, it was never my home. I always liked to come back and tell tales about a place that was so different than where we lived, it never occurred to me to be ashamed of it and I never was.

My grandmother had eleven kids, was the second wife to someone eighteen years her senior. My grandfather was crippled by polio as a child and was not always nice to my grandmother and I didn’t find that out until after he was long gone.  My grandmother can’t read or write but is a master story teller, especially the ghost stories. She has had a really hard life and is left in the care of a daughter who loves her but is bitter because she never had her own life and the rest of the family is in a holding pattern waiting for my grandmother to die. I never made it my grandfather’s funeral down there because the boy was a baby, but my brother’s went and it was awful.  I don’t care if I never see a dime from my mom’s share of the property, they can kill each other and I can be none the wiser.  Sad but true.end of year reminder

Work was crazy today and holy contacts Batman, everybody is trying to use their benefits before the end of the year. It was a crazy, crazy day.  We are scheduling into February and yet people still call trying to get in…..silly patients.  The walk ins for glasses and the patients trying to order contacts is enormous….tomorrow  is our last day this year.

The boy is still cat sitting and wanted Sriracha chicken and lots of it. I made three pounds of it. He will have lots of leftovers since I won’t see him until after my shift ends at the waitress job on New Years Eve. I have the junk food aka chips and dip so we can veg out and watch the ball drop.  I had wanted to take a jacuzzi bath and so does the girl, not sure who will win that battle?

It was a surprisingly emotional day….Zia




About dragonflyzia

I am just a woman finally accepting that I was never meant to be in the box. I don't fit into any stereotypes, please don't try and label me, that doesn't work either. I am embracing my uniqueness in ways that are new and challenging to me, so that I may continue to grow and never stop learning.
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3 Responses to Thank You, Thank You, Thank You

  1. Wow, Zia. This post was a helluva ride. My stepmother was one of 21 children. She was born to the second wife of a man still fathering children into his 70’s. He was born in 1885, and he lived into his 90’s. Only three siblings remain. Your story reminded me of going to visit her mother on a WV holler. One of her brothers had an outhouse. Taking a nighttime visit to that in the cold and dark was not the most fun ever. I was not ashamed. Life is an adventure. But then, I didn’t live there either.

    • dragonflyzia says:

      My grandma grew up in a holler! My mom did not but I bet the stories are similar. 21….holy wow that’s a lot of kids!!!!! In the night there was something called a pee bucket, it’s what you used after your grandpa pulled his gun on you when you had to go in the middle of the night. Yes…. It was a different world. I’m so glad you shared your story 😊

      • I remember walking the blue ridge mountains looking for ginseng because it could be sold for lots of money according to numerous cousins. We never found any. They pronounced it Gin-Sang. At the time I thought it was related to alcohol because my parents drank Gin. LOL

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