Shocked and Afraid

I had a discussion with a friend about moving forward and starting fresh the other day. It was a good talk, we laughed, we made crazy plans that will never happen….we all experience talks like these. It was all fun and games until relationships became the topic.

I find it sad to report that this gave me anxiety…not then, it was more a middle of the night event. I hate to be afraid of anything….fear is weakness and it pisses me off!

I am more afraid to be in a relationship than I am to be alone. Alone is easy peasy….it’s only once in a while you get that itch but it’s short lived. This shocks me a little bit. I have always liked my alone time, it’s a requirement actually but to say it’s easier to be alone surprised me. I have no idea why?

What really shocked me today was my vision. Saturday I noticed things in the distance were a little blurry. With multi focal contacts you have to give a little to get a little so I didn’t really think anything of it. When I was at JD’s Saturday my eyes were incredibly dry so I figured it was time to toss these lenses. I was wearing dailies for so long I had forgotten what it feels like when a lens is past it’s prime. Today I noticed it again at work, the tv wasn’t very clear. We were a little slow because of the snow so the OD checked my vision. I went up half a diopter in each eye. AKA my contacts went from a -4.75 and -4.50 to a -5.25 and a -5.00…what the heck?

Force of nature girl was freaking me out with “you’ve got the suga (sugar)” all afternoon. I looked it up and I don’t have any of those symptoms. Maybe it’s hormone related?  I have my yearly at the obgyn tomorrow and I’m going to have her test me for menopause. This is crazy! I even called my little buddy at the lab to have her pull my old rx’s from back in the day. From 2013-2015 I wore the same script, 2016 I bumped up a quarter in each eye. The strangest thing is that I can read with the new distance script? What is happening? I’m due for my new glasses at work and we are waiting a few weeks to see if this is a real change or not. I’m not thrilled that my power is now stronger but I like the idea of putting progressives off a bit longer.  Only time will tell….

I’m off to make another book page wreath. M from work is ordering it for a charity raffle. I think I will watch the crown while I’m making it since the girl isn’t home to voice her opinion. It goes kind of hand in hand with the new book I am reading…..Zia



About dragonflyzia

I am just a woman finally accepting that I was never meant to be in the box. I don't fit into any stereotypes, please don't try and label me, that doesn't work either. I am embracing my uniqueness in ways that are new and challenging to me, so that I may continue to grow and never stop learning.
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