This mornings dream is brought to you by heartbreak and devastation……Yep, that’s how I started my day.
In my dream this morning I was with the girl and she was helping me make a bed when she said out of the blue “You know your mother adored you?” If there was more to this dream I don’t remember it. I remember those words and waking up in tears. What a way to start the day.
Oddly…the girl barely remembers my mom. Every once in a while I will ask her what she remembers. She always says “her toe ring”. My mom was not a fancy woman but she was tickled by that toe ring which is why I made sure she was buried in it. So it was odd to have the girl say those words to me in a dream, unless it was a mother, daughter thing?
Adored is not a word that I can imagine my mother using regarding me. I am the emotional, huggy person. My mom….not so much. Did I know my mother loved me? Absolutely! We talked every single day and that was the hardest thing to get over when she died.
If someone said my mom said she adores the boy, that would be completely believable. The sun rose and set around the boy. That’s how it should be. Adored, the word seems odd to me.
Most days I’m pretty good about pushing that pain back down, today was a tough one. My mom died in 2001 and it is still raw. Part of me has never recovered from that. She was the only person in this world that I could count on, she was my rock. So when you read my words and shake your head “what has that fool girl gotten herself into now?” just remember….I am an emotional hot mess that is just pretending that everything is okay….Zia