Not By Blood…..

I am still working off a mad from earlier…… Some part of me held me back from going to my aunt’s for Easter. In retrospect….it was a good thing. My family currently lacks a matriarch and because of it we are all scattered. We are not the united front we once were.

I still colored Easter eggs, only in a natural capacity. The elderberry in a syrup form leaves a purple ring on the counter but when it comes to eggs….they look a little brown. Tumeric did a great job in the yellow department. Cranberries….not so much….

The girl didn’t want to go to my aunt’s and to be honest….after the week I had, I wasn’t up for it either. So I text my aunt that we couldn’t make it.  I felt really bad until today. It is some kind of miracle that I kept my mouth shut but I did. Here is how it played out….please feel free to offer up your opinions….

I made a ricotta pie and my aunt made pizzelles …..she was babysitting. I stopped over today to swap desserts and see the baby. The baby was covered from head to toe in eczema. His mother came while I was there and I mentioned that the girl was struggling a bit (not to this extent) and I was working on a cream for her. I suggested that once the baby was a year and I mastered a cream that I would share it with her. The mother replied in a flippant manner “we have plenty of creams, it is what it is and he will have to deal with it.”  That statement alone was hard to swallow and then….yes it gets worse…she scolded the five month old for using his heel to scratch the back of his calf. Did I mention the five month old part?  Honestly I don’t know what kept me from loosing it? Wait…..yes I do… aunt. Her first grandchild is exclusively for my cousin’s wife’s mother….my aunt only gets the sloppy seconds. I will leave out the trash talk that my cousin’s wife talks about my aunt. I wish I could send her my former mother in law…that would be karma if I was choosing. I am not karma, so only time will tell how this will come back and bite her in her oversized ass. She has influenced this wife of another cousin who by need let’s my aunt babysit….for now.

I was already simmering beyond the boiling point over the eczema when the conversation turned towards cataract surgery.  My statement was directed towards the people who play the system…..on Caresource and paying $3000.00 per eye for laser in lieu of traditional surgery. She had the nerve to look at me and say “I hope you never need Caresource in your life.” I am not sure what part of me held back the response “Bitch do you even know what squalor means????” I wish I had it in me to take advantage of the system but I don’t. I get it that all of her clients are mentally challenged and that is not what I was referring to…. I was referring to the patient with the dreads…..high as a flipping kite…driving the brand new cadillac…..that is the problem.

I can’t help that I am a sensitive person….words have have a physical reaction. I have no words….this was hours ago and I am still upset. How  dare she? She knows nothing about me! I have gone without more that I have received help and I NEVER received food stamps or Caresource. I am so offended….there are no words. Even more than that….I am so upset over the skin on that baby…maybe I am too overprotective…..but not my child. There would never be acceptance over something that was clearly a problem.

I love my family but I have no idea how to accept the ignorance of the women chosen by some of my cousins…..Zia


About dragonflyzia

I am just a woman finally accepting that I was never meant to be in the box. I don't fit into any stereotypes, please don't try and label me, that doesn't work either. I am embracing my uniqueness in ways that are new and challenging to me, so that I may continue to grow and never stop learning.
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