Something in me has shifted. I have been purging in one way or another since the beginning of the year. Within the past month it has become more intense and has moved beyond “stuff”.
I read someone’s post today about the full moon / lunar eclipse and all of the planets that are in retrograde at the moment and something clicked in my mind. Since this move I haven’t used the kickstands (kick down door holders) once. I have even left the house unlocked while I was gone more than once. I have even stopped paying attention to who is driving the car behind me. All of those things are progress for me. I had a dream Saturday night that Cockroach was sitting at my kitchen table trying to give me money and swearing that he had changed. I said “absolutely not” and when he said he wasn’t leaving I said “I’m not doing that again” and I woke up. It was only unnerving when I woke up. Even that is progress. This by far is the biggest thing that I have let go….fear… and it feels great!
The last two weeks have also brought new ideas, none of which are ready to be revealed at the moment. It’s a start. I have said before that I was not designed to work a Monday through Friday job and now I am working on ways that may help change that path.
Do you see what I mean? Ouch… I guess that’s what it is supposed to do. I find it very effective. Maintaining the motivation is where it gets difficult for me….Zia