Can’t Even….

I don’t even know if I can put today in words….it’s unbelievable….

Today the girl and I went to a birthday party for my cousin’s daughters. They live out of state and the girls are turning one so this is a pretty big deal in my book. This party also happens to coincide with my ex-husband’s first day of vacation. The boy opted to wake up and go straight to his dad’s house. The girl wanted to go to the party so she came with me.

Her dad lost his mind over this. He wanted to go to the fair to eat and would not go with the boy alone. He threw a huge hissy fit, only acknowledging the boy when he needed someone to yell at. The poor boy spent most of the afternoon sitting in silence being ignored by his dad. The girl was with me when her dad sent her the text “thanks for ruining my vacation!” What?!!!

This is a grown ass man who will be fifty in a few days and this is how he is behaving? Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to keep my mouth shut? What a jerk!

We left earlier than planned because the girl was worried about the boy being alone with their dad. She made the boy come get her so she didn’t have to walk in alone. I told her to call me if she needed me to come and get her, which was more to calm her down than anything.

The girl did end up calling me to come and get her. She went with her brother to work and I found her crying in a booth when I got there. That’s the third time he made her cry today. I guess he told them to go home, he was going to go to work tomorrow and that they were boring anyway. I can’t even believe that I was once married to this guy?

The girl turns 21 in three days and the boy turns 23 next month….they are adults. I can’t fight this battle for them, as much as I want to and I really want to…but I won’t.  How did I deal with my anger? I took it out on some tomatoes….

I canned thirteen pints of salsa tonight. There is something about chopping things into tiny pieces that make me feel better. I don’t follow a recipe for salsa, I chop tomatoes,onions, and cilantro and then cook it down. That’s it. It tastes great because all of the ingredients are fresh. I think I might have to invest in some new rings this years, they are starting to look a little shabby. Some people don’t even store them with the rings but I always leave them on.

I am not prepared to go back to work tomorrow. I’m not even prepared for food tomorrow. I didn’t grocery shop this weekend because I wasn’t going to have the kids and surprise….I have the kids. Oh well, I will just stop on the way home tomorrow…..Zia

About dragonflyzia

I am just a woman finally accepting that I was never meant to be in the box. I don't fit into any stereotypes, please don't try and label me, that doesn't work either. I am embracing my uniqueness in ways that are new and challenging to me, so that I may continue to grow and never stop learning.
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