Something popped up today in my Facebook feed. It was a link to a scholarship of sorts. I don’t stand a chance in hell but that won’t stop me from taking that chance. The fact that I made the decision to take that chance is a huge step for me. What if I lucked out and got the chance and decided to start over a mere nine hours away? Sure it would be scary and the kids would be mad at me for a bit but let’s be real…I’m 48 yrs. old…it’s time to live my life. It’s not like they would be abandoned? It’s the perfect opportunity for their dad to man up and do some work.
I have had messages in dreams telling me that I haven’t purged enough “get rid of more stuff” If it’s not for this opportunity than maybe it’s for the next? I will try and if necessary I will try again and again. Until I step out of the role of caregiver, I will never live for myself. Does that sound harsh? My kids are 21 and 23 for Pete’s sake!
To be honest? It doesn’t really matter if this first opportunity works out…although it would be kick ass if it did! The fact that I am taking the chance and putting it out there to the Universe…it will happen…eventually.
It’s time for me to stop distracting myself and to get busy with the writing side of life….Zia