Spent….

Whew! What a day….Today was our final presentations for the volunteer naturalist program. Everybody was allotted a twenty minute spot and the lady that I have always sat with said her speech would never take twenty minutes and I said I would never finish in twenty minutes. It was a complete swap. She went over and I flew through mine.

Honestly…I didn’t think I would be nervous and when I was, that threw me off. All of us were nervous! There was a woman who teaches with PT who said to the woman next to me “you were nervous and this was your first presentation, I have done this same presentation more than 500 times and I can’t get my hands to stop shaking.” So  not only was I a nervous wreck but I was picking up on everyone else. When I came home I legit sat outside in silence for at least twenty minutes while I grounded myself again. Today was just too much.

My project was a complete whirlwind…I flew through my presentation. My sweet peers said it was neat and cool and they would think twice before they threw something away. Was it a truth? It doesn’t matter,it made me feel better.

I learned a lot from other presentations…now I want to go camping, make syrup, etc. We had a really good group of people in our class. Hopefully I will bump into some of them while accumulating some of my forty hours of required volunteer hours.

I had places that I “had” to go to when I got home…after I grounded  myself the Girl and I ran to three places. I put dinner in the oven and then I crashed. Part of it is the full moon…part of it was the stress of the presentation and everyone else’s stress and the rest was hormones. I was 22 days late this month which I think counts as a skip? I started on Thursday and had a brief pause this morning (thankfully) and then the flood gates opened again later this afternoon.

After running dinner to the ex father in law the Girl and I sat down and watched Bohemian Rhapsody. It was due today from the library…so I will be a day late in returning it. It was well worth the fine. Maybe it was all of the factors that I have previously mentioned or maybe it was just the movie but I was moved. All the way to tears more than once. Good for you Freddie for being true to yourself. Sure you made some mistakes…who hasn’t?  He was the real deal..talent and authentic…a beautiful soul trying to fit into an ugly world.

Maybe part of it is I am tired? I am hoping for a dead to the world kind of sleep tonight…one that pays no attention to the full moon cat shenanigans where I actually get rest, even if the cat is running from window to window. I feel exhausted and off today so hopefully tomorrow will be a better day? I am hoping because I have a ton of catch up work to get done….Zia

 

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About dragonflyzia

I am just a woman finally accepting that I was never meant to be in the box. I don't fit into any stereotypes, please don't try and label me, that doesn't work either. I am embracing my uniqueness in ways that are new and challenging to me, so that I may continue to grow and never stop learning.
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2 Responses to Spent….

  1. Freddy did have talent and vision

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