Which Way is Up?

I don’t even know where to start…..I will choose those words to start over staring at a blank screen. I wasn’t here Thursday because I was making up for lost time around the house. That fairy form not only took a lot of time but I also neglected chores for that day. I would do that again in a heartbeat. I will always choose creating over cleaning. I’m rarely organized at home but work me is a different story.

I have been ordering the contact lenses for well over a year now but Force of Nature Girl still kept the stocking trial lenses and putting trial lenses away as part of her duties. She has been neglecting those duties and gave me the go ahead to take that over. I took a big yellow steno pad in and started organizing. I have 7 1/2 pages of trial lenses that we are missing and the pages are double columned. This was how I spent my Friday and it was a nice change. I didn’t have any perfume/cologne/body odor issues with my nose, I just put away stock in the proper way and make a list of what we needed. It was nice and quiet and probably my most peaceful day I have had so far at this job. My day went really fast.

I stopped and picked up salads for dinner and came home and started organizing some of my paperwork from my herbal studies. I did this while watching and episode and a half of The Crown. I also watched a Grace and Frankie episode before I went to bed. I have been scoping out some cat litter container upcycle projects. I just know these things will be good for something. I wonder if I paint it black, will I still need to remove the label? That seems like a lot of work.

I like a little bit about all of these choices. I really like the look of the chalk board paint but I like the fancy “rags” on the other one. I like the chalk paint ones as well….I just don’t think I am willing to invest the time and money…mostly time, in taking those labels off. I’m not even so sure why I am focusing on it, I have something to do after work every day this week. April is turning out to be quite busy.

I went into work a little early tonight because I had a party. Thank goodness I had a party since the restaurant was pretty slow. It ended up being a good night thanks to that party. Now I am here…. I need to get everything ready for tomorrow so when I leave in the morning everything will be ready. Since I am not a morning person this is necessary. I have my Fire Reiki course tomorrow from 9-3. Thank goodness for Crockpots! I also need to pack a lunch and I have no idea what I am going to bring. I should probably go and figure that out……Zia

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My Zen

I could say with certainty that creating is my Zen. Over the years I have become very good at looking at something, seeing it another way, and then making it happen. Maybe it started out of necessity? Maybe I have always been that way? I can’t pinpoint when it started. People will look at something that I have made and say “that takes a lot of patience.”  I don’t think it’s patience since that is not one of my strong points. I really think it might be my Zen.

I found a permanent place (in a temporary house) for my Papyrus piece that I re-framed yesterday.

The glare isn’t horrible in this picture but you can see one of my salt lamps. When I stopped at Goodwill today I found a unique map for the girl. She is drawn to globes and maps and this was totally her style.

She immediately pointed out the sea monster and then the ship. I did make it to get my blood work done this morning, I slept in yesterday so it had to be today. Hopefully the tests will show something. The doctor scoffed at my peri menopause claim….today was day 11 of the weirdest period ever. Everything was fine with the pap and the mammogram…..only time will tell.

I ran into an old friend today at the health food store. I am not used to bear hugs and was completely taken off guard. I was talking to the young girl I know who works there. When I went to the snooty yoga studio she was getting her teacher training. She is now in a place where she can open her own studio as I was learning about when he walked in. He told her twice, maybe three times that I was his first kiss. Spin the bottle in the back yard when you aren’t even a teenager doesn’t really count….does it? It doesn’t mater it was a million years ago. It was good to see him and holy gray Batman….BonJovi made me feel old…this kid made me feel old….do you think the Universe is telling me I am old?

I came home and started working on my next project that has been hanging around. Do you remember when I found this dress form at Goodwill a while ago?

I finally tackled my fairy project. It took the rest of the afternoon to finish her. I got this far and it just didn’t look right. I enlisted PT who has made this type of project before for help. She was right….it needed to be longer.

Even though I knew it was missing something, I was pretty excited at this point. I love how the wings turned out and how everything just looked like it was always there. I had to run back to the store to find something for the skirt to balance it out. I’m not gonna lie….I was getting a little anxiety. I really wanted to finish this tonight and it was hard finding something after the fact to match. I am happy with the finished project….I’m not sure if I would attempt this project again? I lucked out at the $2.99 price for the wooden dressform, this would be crazy expensive to make if I hadn’t found that deal.

Two projects done this week and it feels good! If I don’t find something to do with these Tidy Cat buckets in the next week these things are going to the recycle center. I can only do so much……Zia

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Little Projects

Sometimes….well let’s be honest….most of the time, I end up overwhelmed with projects. I always think that I have more time than I actually do. In the case of deodorant for the girls rugby team, I had to order an ingredient.  I made a batch last night. I can’t meet up with the girl who is delivering them until next Sunday right after my Fire Reiki class.

Since I was childless again tonight…. I came home to let the dog out, feed the animals and went back out. I bought a picture around Christmas from the Restore for $8.00. I had always coveted those Papyrus pieces that I used to frame back in the day and now I owned one. It laid against the wall on the side of the bed for months. Tonight I took it to Hobby Lobby. I had a mat that actually matched the piece cut and bought a wall frame. I used a coupon on the mat and the frame was 50% off.  I have roughly $36.00 into the piece if you count the original $8.00 which I am.

Once I took the original frame off and removed the mat I was appalled at the mounting of this piece. It wasn’t archival mounting and it will be more noticeable in another ten to fifteen years. The color choice of the mat and the frame should have been a clue.

I took the orange mat off, had a black, black core mat cut, and picked a new frame. I didn’t want to chance damaging the Papyrus so I left the mounting as is.

The original frame was 16 x 19.5….. 1/2 an inch from a standard size. While that worked in my favor, it makes me like this framer less and that is already pretty low. In my opinion, it looks much better now. I guess I’m still a frame snob….Oh well, somethings never change. I’m not leaving it in this spot, I was just trying to fight the glare and get a good picture. It was impossible without help from the girl. I’m not even sure where I am going to hang yet.

I feel like I am on a little roll…..now if only I could keep up the momentum……Zia

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Playing With Light

I learned a lot in my first photography class and now that it is getting nicer, I have no excuse not to practice.

This was the first picture that I liked, the next angle was taken by my teacher with my camera…..which is why it’s the best of the bunch.

A little bug photo bombed this next picture.

This was the best picture that I took and there is a stick in the background…ugh!  I was so focused on the flower that I didn’t even see it. We removed the stick and I tried again but it’s not the same.

Then he brought out his mega lens….seriously someone could have yelled cheers from it. He put it on my camera which is too small for it but I did my best. This little robin was was across the lawn and the tree was just on a whim and it might be my second favorite picture.

I think it’s a good start…..Zia

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Reflected Mess

I started my Saturday at a gentle stretch yoga class and this week I talked my aunt into going with me. I’m not 100% sure that she liked it? I guess we’ll see if she comes back next week. After yoga we went to the Restore to pick up the mirror I bought. I think $65.00 is high for a mirror from the Restore but I liked it and all money earned goes back into the houses which is a good thing. It fit perfectly in the back of her van. This is my new mirror, please excuse the reflected mess.

It’s in the walk-thru/writing room now. This house is tricky…I was always taught that a mirror can’t face a window or an open door. Silly superstitions…maybe? I don’t need anymore weirdness in my life so I will use caution.

I tried one of those Facebook projects. It looked sparkly and cool in the video….real life?….not so much. It did fulfill my need to play with food coloring and since the kids are too old to color Easter eggs, it all worked out. I just don’t love the finished project. You mix gel food coloring with Mod Podge, glitter and a little water.Bake at 200 degrees for fifteen minutes. I baked for longer than that and I still had soft goop in the bottom.

I spent 0.50 on the little glasses at the Restore and I don’t think that $2.00 is bad for an experiment. The video used a small Mason jar which is a waste to me, especially if I can put jelly in that jar.

I went to wine taste today as I do almost every Saturday and sampled the most amazing wine. I really liked this one and was ready to go out of my normal wine budget to buy it at it’s crazy $22.99 price. The boy was with me and since he owed me $20.00, he offered to buy the wine. I am using this scrumptiousness as an incentive. I can drink it after I produce five chapters. Why five? I have no idea, it just seemed like a good start to me. I have it sitting on my desk now tempting me and hopefully motivating me……

It wasn’t a bad waitress night. It’s the first weekend of the month and that isn’t usually a money maker and tonight was no exception. I did however, have two of my favorite couples come in. That makes it a little easier when you are there later than normal, it’s about the connections. I know this waitress job isn’t forever and I am grateful that it isn’t my everyday job but part of me will miss it when it’s gone.  I need to remember this feeling when I am dragging my feet because I don’t want to go in to work.  It’s because of this job that I get to do things like my photography class tomorrow……Zia

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Adjusting My Focus

I made the library deadline with Poldark, ten episodes in seven days is a lot for me. I’m not sure how I feel about the show at the moment, I am disappointed in more than one character and I’m not so sure that I will show up for season three. No spoilers here.

While I was watching season two I finished two book page wreaths. Crude girl bought one and originally I was making the second one as a potential demo for a craft store class. I ended up donating it to a fundraiser for a local girl’s rugby team and they are also going to test out my deodorant for me. Maybe then I will feel that I have enough testimonials to sell it locally? I have only had one person break out under their arms from it….one out of fifteen isn’t so bad.

Do you remember the girl I talked about who came out about her domestic abuse relationship? The one I babysat when I was a teenager? She was the one asking for the donation. She hugged me like three times…it’s been years since I have seen her it was awkward for a bit. When I make the deodorant I will deliver it to the little bar where she works. That’s going to take some courage. PT has been in there and there are people from the Cockroach time that frequent this place. I am just going to have to suck it up, I can’t avoid forever. Maybe I will get lucky and I can slip in and out and nobody I know will be there?  I am going to shoot for this Sunday as a delivery date so fingers crossed.

The girl and I went over colors to repaint her furniture and this is the look we are going for with her pieces.

We are going to experiment with this new nightstand I bought last week.

My pieces I am keeping the Shabby Chic (for lack of a better description) type white but with a chalk paint finish. I am also going to paint my grandmother’s lingerie chest to match. I don’t care for the finish and it doesn’t match a single thing I own so I’m going to do it. My aunt gave me the “I’m not so sure about that” look when I mentioned it to her but that was years ago. Speaking of my aunt, I need to call her tonight and remind her about yoga on Saturday and ask her if she will help me pick up a mirror I bought from the Restore. Wait till you see it…….and hopefully it will fit in the back of her van. I am trying really hard to focus on what I like and then letting the rest go. Focus….I need to do more of that for sure…..Zia

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I have noticed a few bitter feelings showing up here or there lately…..The stores are setting up for summer and they have outdoor chairs set up outside. My stolen chairs still sting…even more than the picnic table. Cute little bird feeders are everywhere….not that I have a shepherd’s hook to hang them on, even those I can let go but the big fancy one that took me years to build from Wild Birds Unlimited….that makes me see red. During the  last few weeks Spring fever has stirred up these old wounds up but today I was gifted with an unexpected closure. The old house was torn down….

When did I have the dream of the single file bunnies that ended with a yellow construction vehicle coming down the driveway? I am so relieved that it is gone. I watched my mother take her last breath in that house. I painted everything that didn’t move in that house and yet it never felt like it was mine. How many Cockroach memories are gone forever? Don’t get me wrong, there were some good memories and yet all I feel is relief. What will I miss? The smell of my lilac bush that sweetened the spring air all the way into the house…..the birds that I fed that frequented the yard, the smell of a bonfire…I really miss the bonfires. The few things that I do miss don’t outweigh the bad things and or people that were there. Now it’s gone and I say good riddance!

The girl brought me in a daffodil from the yard yesterday…..the cat killed it in less than twelve hours so I guess it’s the thought that counts.

Yesterday while the girl was cleaning the living room and dusting the bookshelves she did a little rearranging. Her OCD is worse than mine and found several places that I could buy book four of this series in paperback so it would look better. Really? Does that matter? To her it does, she can’t stand it. I keep telling her that maybe if she made it past book two she could offer up an opinion, but it’s on tv now and she will never read those books, they are too different from the show.

I had an ah ha moment the other day that I forgot to tell you about. I was checking out at one of the craft stores when one of the customers was talking about classes when it hit me….why didn’t I think of it before? I can teach a book page wreath class. I called one of my old peeps from Joann’s and she gave the the name of the girl I need to call tonight. Maybe I can teach at both stores? I have taught more than one class at Joann’s  in the past but I have never taught at the other.  Crude girl just bought a wreath so maybe I will whip up two displays at the same time and peddle my wares this Wednesday? It’s a thought…..Zia

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Messed Up Dream World

I had planned for today to be a catch up day. The girl and I have a massive list and the only plans to leave the house are a quick trip to the laundromat and a quicker trip to the grocery store.  I am making my grandmother’s pizza for dinner today and the girl is on dinner duty tomorrow. The list is small though, less than five items so it should be quick. It will take all afternoon for the dough to rise so we have time.

I saw a post on Facebook this morning from a craft show at a local high school….darn I didn’t know it was this weekend. I am making myself stick to the original plan. I don’t need anything and I already have too many projects on my plate so I am restraining that urge to get in my car and go check it out.

Why the craziness to get ahead of the cleaning game? I have a Holy Fire Reiki course coming up. I don’t have a date yet but it will more than likely be on a Wednesday or a Sunday, the days I get things done. Next Sunday I have a one on one with my cousin’s cousin and my camera. We are meeting at a local park and fingers crossed there will be wildflowers by then. Two big learning projects that both require practice….that is why I am trying to get ahead.

Yesterday when I was at the Restore I found this little night stand for only $15.00.

I have the nightstand that goes with our furniture and the girl uses a three shelf wicker stand that I painted years ago. I decoupaged fairies on the top of it because originally it was in my room. This doesn’t match exactly but it’s pretty darn close, the style is the same. I told her she needed to pick a new color and we would repaint her dressers and paint this one to match. That bright blue she has on there now looks horrible and she did it herself….there will be sanding involved. Her poor painting skills popped up in one of my dreams last night.

There were three dreams and they all involved the Cockroach. I can’t remember the first one and the second is kind of fuzzy. I remember a large sliding glass window and that Cockroach was going out to by drugs. Either the car was gold or the tire rims were gold…I just remember gold. I knew I wasn’t going to let him back in but I didn’t know how to stop him. I debated about calling the police because I hate to call the police, it makes me feel weak. Then I woke up. The place in this dream was not familiar at all and I have no idea what the point of it was.

The last dream I was setting up at a craft show (yes I know that is really strange and coincidental) and I was having a panic moment….you know the one where you are late for class and can’t get your locker open….that kind of panic. I didn’t have anything ready? I was going through things under the table and finding all kinds of things that didn’t belong at a craft show. I had a box of little girl clothes that I didn’t recognize and some baby toys. A little girl showed up and started whining that she wanted a toy so of course I said go ahead and take one. The once baby toys are now barbie doll type toys…They are naked doll with nipples, yes I found it a tad disturbing in the dream world as well. They all had symbols on their bodies but the one that stuck out was in this yoga pose, with spiral tattoos and had a large dragonfly across her chest.

Then I was back to putting things on the table. Cockroach came back with the kids and said “signs, signs, everywhere there are signs…you will love it. Go look.” I can’t look what is he talking about there is too much to do?  The guy at the table next to me had beautiful Goddess Christmas cards in a royal blue box. Then I am in the garage only it’s a combination of the garage at this house and the building at the old house. I was cleaning it out and it was empty when I was done and things were beautifully organized..the waking me is jealous. One of the girl’s friends mom was there and I was giving her some of my old custom frames and I said “this is a beautiful quality frame…or it was before the girl badly painted it black and white, all it needs is a little paint and it will be good as new.” Then I woke up.

I get the painting and the girl, that discussion happened. I get the signs, signs, part because I said it last week to a girl at work “If the Universe has to send me more signs of new beginnings then I really do need wacked on the head with a Shillelagh stick!” The little girl could be my inner child? Those dolls….anybody want to offer an explanation on that one? They bordered on disturbing? Sometimes in my dreams I get dizzy, like it’s too much and I don’t know what that’s about either.

I guess that’s it for this week venture into my messed up dream world……Zia

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Hard To Watch

First I was going to call today’s post Freak Show because of the off the wall patients we had today but then decided that nobody really wants to read work stuff on a Friday. I wasn’t even going to post at all, I was just going down my list checking things off.

I picked up two reserves this week at the library, Poldark season 2 and Girl on the Train. There are quite a few people after me for Girl on the Train so I decided to watch that tonight so I could take it back after yoga tomorrow. I read the book so I knew the plot and was only surprised by my reaction. I don’t think I read, read this book, I think I listened to it which means I was listening while doing other things. Or maybe it was just hard to watch? I don’t remember holding my breath in the book but let me tell you….I held my breath a lot tonight. It really doesn’t matter the level of severity….a mind fuck is still a mind fuck. I am surprised at myself and the level of anxiety that this movie gave me.

On another note,I broke down and bought a dream catcher today.

The only dream I remember from last night involved me giving Rob Lowe the tour of the office while I searched for the nurse he was looking for….her birthday is this weekend so all day she kept asking me where he was. Hey, I just dream it, it’s always weird and if you have a cameo appearance I will tell you. Maybe this will make a difference? Maybe not? If I could dream a little and sleep more soundly, I think it would make a big difference.

I am just happy that it’s Friday and I get to sleep in a little bit tomorrow morning. Maybe something interesting will happen tomorrow?…..Zia

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Mission Accomplished

Everyone was happy with their card and collage…it was not my best work but the sentiment behind it was clear.

I wanted to do something using song lyrics and the paper petals were too small to get the effect and that is how this little tree was born. I wrote up something small with the date and location of the concert and inserted the picture collage. The optician was thrilled and since this was her bucket list event, that is what mattered most.

The girl did the Spring poop clean up outside and I only had to ask her once and it wasn’t even today….scary, I know.  We even took the beagle for a walk tonight since it was nice and not to cold. After lecturing the boy that life was more than sleep and work and that he needed to make a little play date with his friends….he listened too and currently has a friend over. Both kids rolled their eyes at my use of play date but I was going for the over dramatic and it worked.

I didn’t get much more done tonight once I made dinner. I only have a week to watch Poldark season 2 and only have one episode watched. I forgot how much I disliked George Warleggan, if I could reach into the tv and punch him in the throat I would. Grrr I don’t like him at all. I guess that means he plays his part well since he invokes such emotion.

I’m off to finish washing dishes and watching episode 2. Tomorrow is Friday, thank goodness……Zia

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